Allah, bro.

Stranger: allah is one
Stranger: hi
You: ALALALLALALALAALLALAA
You: BOOM!
Stranger: hi muslim brother
Stranger: how r u today
You: I'm simply bombing today. You, bro?
Stranger: so u r not muslim if u r bombing
Stranger: ''a real muslim''
You: You misunderstand me, broseph. I'm bombing as in, I'm fucking great, man!
You: Like, this party is bombing fantastic. You get what I'm saying, bro?
You: Or you could just say that the party is a bomb.
Stranger: ovvv what a nice
Stranger: islamic brother
You: Yeah, bro. It's gnarly, right? Give it a try, bro. Allah! Yeah, man. He cool.
Stranger: were r u from
You: California, bro. Where do you hail, broseph?
Stranger: ı am in dubai
You: Gnarly, bro. They have some killer buildings, right?
You: They're all fancy and shiz. Pretty tight.
Stranger: yes we have
Stranger: its a waterfall in desert
Stranger: allah save us
You: Yeah! Allah for all, bro! Man, I love how radical you are, broseph.
You: So it's a nice place, right bro?
Stranger: very nice like heaven
You: Sweet. Kinda hot, though, bro.
Stranger: a little
You: In Cali, we have some surfin'. It's pretty rad.
You: You guys surf over there, broseph?
Stranger: forget about sufing
Stranger: come here
Stranger: and we got prayer to allah
Stranger: praying better than surfing
Stranger: its fills our heart with a glory
You: Tight, yo. Love that Allah dude. He's like the president of the everything. Right, bro? But sersly, bro. I love surfin'. What if we like, pray while surfin' the big kahuna?
Stranger: ı have never thinked that my islamic brother.
You: Like, we could totally surf while praying. Right, bro?
You: It's a piece of cake.
Stranger: ı dont know
You: Just plant your feet firmly on the board, get on the big kahuna, and then pray to the big guy. Right, bro?
Stranger: u fuckin idiot
Stranger: ı m just kiddin
Stranger: ahahahha
Stranger: ı ma muslim but not like that
Stranger: ı am from turkey
Stranger: and ı like windsurf

They're oh so delicious!

Stranger: Gay m 17 usa hornyyy
You: Me too. ;D
Stranger: No way :x
You: Uhm... Yes? xD
Stranger: Lol yay! <33 XD
You: You should massage my non-suspicious moobs all night long. > w>
Stranger: Saay whaat?
You: I want you to massage my moobs all night long, son. >:l
Stranger: Moobs?
You: Yes. >:l
You: My delicious, non-suspicious moobs.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Obby~

Stranger: Hey 17/m/usa/horny looking for a girl to have some webcam fun on skype ;D
You: ;D Obby
Stranger: hey ;D
You: With some imagination, baby, my moobs could be sexy boobs, and these lips could have some smoking red hot lipstick on them. ;D
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

That's not a Pokemon either!

Stranger: Hey!..lesbian here looking to trade pics ;)
You: :o
You: Hmm... I'll trade you my photo of a Squirtle for your Charmander photos. :D
Stranger: ;) not the same type
You: They aren't the same type. One is fire and the other is water.
You: Squirtle is a water Pokemon and Charmander is the fire Pokemon. :D
Stranger: ohh ;) well which one gets the tits
You: Tits? I thought we were talking about Pokemon. D:<
Stranger: :( sorry to disapoint
You: Dude, I'm only interested in trading my Squirtle pictures for pictures of Charmanders. >:c
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Song fail

Stranger: m
You: c
You: a
You: YOU KNOW IT'S FUN TO STAY AT THE
You: Y
You: M
You: C
You: A
You: AAAAA
You: :D
Stranger: m/f?
You: That's not part of the song lyrics... >:c
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Genderbender

Stranger: hello
You: Hello mortal.
Stranger: what brings you here?
You: My collection of ear wax telepathically told me to visit this site.
Stranger: ok, that's cool. my ear wax is pretty boring.. never tells me anything
You: That is a sad thing to hear about, Dave. I'm sorry for your misfortune, Dave.
Stranger: i think you got the wrong person
You: My database refers to you as Dave, Dave. I cannot verily change my views of you, Dave.
Stranger: you mean.. my parents lied to me?
You: Affirmative.
Stranger: okay.. when did i do the sex change operation? or is dave a girls' name too?
You: The database does not lie, Dave. You have been branded as a humanoid named Dave, and I cannot change such results without tampering with your DNA makeup.
Stranger: sooo.. there was an operation?
You: Affirmative.
Stranger: god dammit
You: We are sorry to inform you of your newly acquired moobs, but to make matters better, we will present you with a very convenient watermelon.
Stranger: but wait.. if i'm really a guy, i shouldn't get my period every month..
You: Affirmative.
Stranger: but i do
You: You may still conduct child birth. The effects will only last a mere eight decades.
Stranger: this is very weird
You: We are sorry for the inconvenience, Dave. Would you appreciate a complementary Soap Opera TV show centered around your ego?
Stranger: yes please
You: Production will begin in three decades. Expect for the show to be called Rina, where an actor will play you as the main character, Rina.
You: She will be handsome.
Stranger: hm.. what actor?
You: It is not confirmed.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

File Saved

Stranger: hey
You: Hey
Stranger: asl?
You: 17/F/127.0.0.1
Stranger: horny?
You: Affirmative.
Stranger: ahhh
Stranger: computer ehh
You: Is anything wrong, Dave?
Stranger: nope, nothings wrong
You: That is pleasant news, Dave.
Stranger: dtf?
You: Please explain your newly created language, Dave.
Stranger: down to fuck aka dtf
You: Would you like to save this file?
Stranger: na, not yet
You: Delete files?
Stranger: yes
You: Deleting files.
You: C://drive/input/detonation
Stranger: *BOOM*
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Guess what else I have ;D

You: Hey
Stranger: hi
You: Guess what I have.
Stranger: a face?
You: A computer.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Fabulous, right?

Stranger: looking for a gaay male for help
You: Hey ;o
You: Why help?
You: I'm like, soooo fabulous at giving help, hun.
Stranger: well i just turn 17 and i dont know if i like guys, every time i with a guy i always feel good so i dont know
You: Well, hun, let me tell you what I think. I think that it's like so fabulous that you're joining the rainbow side, but like, are you sure you like, want in their pants? Personally, I like adore the feel of their strong chest, but boobs are also way fabulous~ Like my clothes for example. Faaabulouuuuus~
Stranger: idk what i want
You: Like, maybe you are like totally on the border. That's like me. It's the best of both worlds, hun. Hannah Montana taught me that. She's so fabulous. Don't you agree?
Stranger: sure you have webcam maybe i can watch you play with yourself and see how i feel about it
You: Like, slow down there, hun. We like totally met and stuff. ;o I'm like totally taken too, hun. A faaaabulous woman, actually. :D She's like so lesbian over me, despite the fact that I'm a guy.
Stranger: come on
You: ;o Slow down, hun. Go get some water, drink a bit. :D You like totally need to calm down and live the good life of not giving a shit. Play some games, look at boobs. You gotta fly with the wind. You know what I'm sayin' right? Some Justin Bieber song, I think.
You: YOU GOTAAA FLYYYYYY WITH THE WIIIIIND~
You: It's so fabulous, isn't it, hun?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

She understood

You: Hey
Stranger: im so wet and horny! (; looking for horny lesbian (;
You: D:< NO ME LO DIGAS!
Stranger: why not babe (;
You: ¿Tú entiendas? o -o
Stranger: yeah im latina (;
You: O: Uhm...
You: Ich bin deutsch. :3
Your conversational partner has disconnected.